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Saturday 29 September 2012

Careful With That Axe Eugene!

Blunt Axe

There was an executioner called Beck,
Who was paid to cut off heads by the neck,
But was exceedingly lax,
About sharpening his axe,
And of his victims made a terrible wreck. 

He gave his instrument a mighty swing,
But, though it was a frightening thing,
It just seemed to drop,
It didn’t actually chop,
And simply delivered a slight sting. 

The prisoner with his head on the block,
Whose knees had already started to knock,
Said: “For God’s sake, you dick,
Get on and make it more quick,
Much longer and I’ll expire here of shock!” 

This caused Beck to issue forth a great grunt,
And for the whet-stone started to hunt,
For it’s no use just tutting,
When you’re meant to be cutting,
And you can’t chop with an axe when it’s blunt.


Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2012

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