Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline
– Sunday 15th December 2013
Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
1.
Bromham High Court was surprised to hear Lord
Chief Justice “Stringer” Judge publicly rebuke Dave Wentwrong, leader of the
Field Land-Owners’ Party (FLOP) and Head of Bromham Parish Council, over a
tweet which the latter had sent, which had an impact on the current
high-profile trial of Nigel “Knocker” Piglet.
In response to an earlier question, Wentwrong confirmed that he had no
problem with the excessive consumption of carrots, and that he was definitely
part of “Team Piglet”.
2.
And
in surprise move in the mysterious and hidden fiefdom of Trowbridge, it is
reported that the Deputy Head of the County Council, who is also the uncle
of Tom “Kill” Emmall, leader of the
Council, was tried by a hastily-summoned exchange of tea and biscuits and found
guilty of gross incompetence in office.
In an official communique, Ron “Shifty” Piglet was described as a
traitor to the Trowbridge ideal, the scum of the local earth, and a lackey of
the capitalist Melksham running dogs. In
a subsequent move which shocked the county, Piglet was later reported to have
been summarily asked to leave the building.
3.
For
details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local
radio station Carrot FM.
Copyright
Andy Fawthrop 2013
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