Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 19th March 2023
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. In a rough week for financial institutions, rescue packages have had to be mounted by the D-Town Underwriting Main Bank (DUMB) for both the Silicon Shortcut Bank, and Credit Melksham. Both banks had over-extended themselves in recent months by providing unsecured loans to unreliable borrowers, such as politicians, estate agents, octopus farmers based on the canal, and other ne’er-do-wells.
2. Meanwhile an Arrest Warrant has been issued by D-Town’s International Criminal Kremlin (DICK) in the name of Vlad The Bad, head of the break-away Trowvegas Western Anarchist Tribune (TWAT) for crimes against humanity. He is accused, amongst other things, of raiding milk floats in the infamous Beanacre Valley, and substituting lethal full-fat milk in place of healthy semi-skimmed. The brave local resistance fighters have asked West Wiltshire for more armour-plated milk-floats and WMD (Weapons of Mass Dairy) products.
Copyright Andy
Fawthrop 2023
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