Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 14th January 2024
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. In an extension of its overblown foreign policy, D-Town has launched pre-emptive strikes of milk round deliveries and new bus services in areas of the county that have nothing to do with D-Town. Milk deliveries have begun in that awkward bit of country near the River Avon, just before you get to Bath. A spokesperson for the Clowncil announced that these “operations” (which had been carried out in tandem with Melksham Council) were “necessary to ensure the safely of D-Town deliveries, and were in no way meant to signal an escalation in wider county hostilities”. Yeah, right.
2. Several busses in the fleet of double-deckers on the 49 route have been taken out of service whilst safety checks are carried out. Last week a window panel blew out on the ascent of Caen Hill towards D-Town. Whilst this was very frightening for the passengers, no-one was actually sucked to an agonising high-pressure death, and the bus arrived safely in the Market Place. It is chilling to think of what might have happened if the bus had been anywhere near Swine-town or TrowVegas.
Copyright Andy
Fawthrop 2024
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