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Sunday, 6 October 2013

News From Bromham - Dateline Sunday 6th October 2013

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – Sunday 5th October 2013

Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:

1.       Work has begun by Trowbridge Weapons Inspectors to find and dismantle the chemical warfare stockpile held by the Seend Separatist Movement.  This is believed to consist of several bags of unidentified mouldering substances stored in a shed near the Seend Village Hall, and could contain both weed-killer and slug powder, now banned as Weapons of Mass Garden Destruction.

2.       Ted Willybanned, leader of the Carrot-Rooters’ Action Party (CRAP), became involved in a slanging match with the Bromham Bugle (“all the news that’s unfit to print”) regarding an article which seemed to imply that its dad was bigger than his dad. Willeyband wrote a letter saying “Isn’t”, and the Bugle responded with a further article head-lined “Is!!” and saying that they would slap anyone who said otherwise.  Willeybanned has now demanded to know, through the Press Complaints Commission “You and Whose Army?”  The row is expected to continue for some time.

3.       For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.


Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2013

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