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Tuesday, 4 August 2015

God Throws In The Towel

God Throws In The Towel

Come and listen to me, you sinners,
And I’ll tell you this for beginners -
Here’s a situation without any winners.

You lot never listen, so here’s a prod -
I’m getting fed-up of sitting here on my tod,
So I’ve decided to jack it all in as Lord God.

You might think it’s a doddle being divine,
But it’s boring, and not everything’s fine,
And that’s why I’ve decided to resign.

It’s a big vacancy that I’ll be freeing,
Cause it’s ever so tiring being all-seeing,
To say nothing of acting the Supreme Being.

For all eternity I’ve been celibate:
It’s been lonely up here with no mate,
Apart from that slip-up with Mary on our last date.

Anyway, I think it would be for the best,
Cos by now you’ve probably guessed,
Frankly – I’ve completely lost interest!

I’m the Ancient Of Days, and I’m tired,
And, though I know I can never be fired,
I think a new guy should be interviewed and hired.

I hate to be leaving you all in the lurch,
But I’m totally hacked off with the Church,
So for a successor you’ll need to get on with the search.

So it’s all over, and enough is enough.
Finding a new Father might be quite rough,
But that’s your bloody problem now – tough!

Just one piece of advice, I say with a great howl:
I know that I’m the one throwing in the towel,
But for the sake of Me, don’t get Simon Cowell!


Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2015

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