Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline
– Sunday 12th June 2016
Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
1. In
true British spirit, and after months of planning, the village turned out in
force today to celebrate the 90th birthday of the little old woman
who lives in that broken-down cottage in the leafy lane outside the pub. The High Street was closed to traffic for a
street party, organised by her grandson Peter Piglet. More than seven tables were crammed with
people who had paid up to £5 each for a ticket.
Security was tight with all bags being searched, mostly to prevent
people from bringing in their own food.
Villagers were given a free hamper containing a cheese sandwich, an
apple, a carrot, a packet of crisps, a bottle of Vimto and a flag bearing the
motto “Happy Birthday Grannie”. The
event lasted nearly thirteen minutes before thunder, lightning and torrential
rain drove the party-goers into the Saloon bar of The Wounded Ferret.
2. Meanwhile,
Bromham Casuals were playing their first game in the Group Stage of the Wiltshire
2016 Tournament in Trowbridge. There was
crowd trouble before, during, and after the game, as disillusioned fans, who
had been hoping for a few months away from soccer, were forced to watch the
usual tedious 0-0 draw, in designated “fan-zones”. After several hours of rioting in central
Trow-vegas, the clean-up campaign began, with local police estimating that
nearly £10-worth of damage had been caused.
3.
For
details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local
radio station Carrot FM.
Copyright
Andy Fawthrop 2016
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