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Sunday, 11 December 2016

News From Bromham - Dateline Sunday 11th December 2016

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – Sunday 11th December 2016

Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
                                                        
1.       After four days of intense and, at times, gripping detailed legal argument in Bromham High Court this week, absolutely nothing was finally decided.  Their lordships, having practised how to enter and leave the room, how to sit down, how to call a recess, and how to take an extended lunch, decided that they were far too tired to go on listening to the evidence for any longer.  Instead they have decided to recess for six weeks and read some books about it, before delivering their judgement in January.

2.       Several more ex-farm hands have come forward to allege vegetable malpractice in the 1960s and 1970s.  Bromham police are now inundated with cases to investigate, as more and more people are encouraged to speak out.  The offences, involving inappropriate usage of both carrots and courgettes, were apparently committed behind farm buildings by gang-bang-masters, and sometimes even out in the open fields, particularly after dark.  One victim, with bulging eyes, is said to have suffered severe trauma from a marrow.

3.       For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.


Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2016

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