Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 21st October
2018
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1.
In
the wake of the amazing, and frankly incomprehensible, news that Kleenex are to
withdraw their “man-size” tissues on the grounds that such a label is sexist,
the shock waves have finally reached The Vize.
All manholes in the borough are to be replaced with personholes, records
by Manfred Mann will be re-recorded as Personfred Person, and supermarkets will
replace their mandarin oranges with persondarin oranges. The local theatre will be putting on a
production of G.B. Shaw’s “Person And Superperson”. No snowflakes were hurt in the making of this
new world order.
2. Meanwhile a TrowVegas chip
shop has finally admitted responsibility for battering a sausage, after nearly
two weeks of previous denials. CCTV
footage conclusively proved that a D-Town man was seen entering the fish
emporium, whilst looking for something to eat, but was not seen leaving with
anything substantial under his arm, and the battered sausage could not be
conclusively traced to his order. The
shop had claimed at first that he had
only ordered chips, but later admitted that a sausage may have been involved.
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2018
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