Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 19th September 2021
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. A diplomatic row has broken out after D-Town announced a new strategic alliance with The Sham and Trowvegas (STUD). The deal, which will mean Trowvegas buying a new fleet of rubber-band-powered milk floats, in place of their current string-driven models, has annoyed the local Swindonian super-power, and STUD’s former ally Westbury, which will now lose its previous contract for string production. Each town has now summoned the others’ ambassadors for a verbal dressing-down, as well as withdrawing its ambassadors from all of the others. Now no-one has clue what is going on. Milk deliveries are not expected to be speeded up until 2024.
2. And high-level discussions are taking place over the current shortages in the supply chain. Most councillors & bureaucrats are almost out of excuses, and the provision of truth is under threat. Alibis and pretensions have already been rationed for some time. Shelves of obfuscation are now almost empty, and the supply of hot air is clearly threatened. The reasons for this sad state of affairs are complex, but are variously blamed on Covid, Brexit, SARS, BSE, ASAP, RSVP and flatulence.
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2021
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