Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 22nd January 2023
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. A D-Town councillor will retain his place at The Town Hall after recent irregularities were fully explained. Despite eating several cuddly kittens (“an oversight”), running over two children in his Audi (“a simple careless mistake”) and beating his mistress to within an inch of her life (“look, I’ve owned up straight away and apologised”), police have decided to take no further action. A line will now be drawn, and we can all move on. Thank goodness for that.
2. And a man from The Vize has decided to give up driving his car for good. After discovering the recent rise in the cost of fuel, he declared “look, there’s just nothing left in the tank. I think it’s time to move on.” He is reported to be starting a new career as a cyclist, or possibly a pedestrian.
Copyright Andy
Fawthrop 2023
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