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Sunday, 6 May 2012

News from Bromham - dateline Sunday 6th May 2012

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – 6th May 2012

Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
·         Counting went on into the early hours yesterday before a result could be declared in voting to see who would be the next mayor of Greater Bromham (GB).  Eventually, by a matter of only a few votes, Doris Piglet was re-elected for another four years, narrowly defeating the veteran outside candidate Ben Motorhome.  It is thought that Motorhome will now drive off into the sunset and retire from active politics.

·         Yesterday marked only 2012 hours to the opening ceremony of the Bromham Carnival, and the re-dedication of one of the key venues.  In driving wind and rain, nearly seven people packed into the Diamond Jubilee Field as the first public stress-test of the entry arrangements.  Organisers admitted that they were disappointed with the low turn-out, but felt that this might have had something to do with the intense security regime that had been put in place.  Having avoided electric fences, rolls of barbed wire and the tank-traps, several people drew the line at running the gauntlet down sniper alley.  The ground-to-air missiles mounted on the church roof, and the machine-gun nests along the High Street were also described by some as “dis-incentives” to reaching the Carnival venue.

·         Sport: In a tense and bad-tempered Wiltshire Laxative Cup Final, Bromham Casuals went down to a 2-1 defeat by bitter rivals Heddington Nutcases.  After going 2-0 down early in the second half, irascible Casuals’ manager Benny Dogleash brought on out-of-form striker Dwayne Mooney, who nearly turned the game around.  In the ten minutes that he was on the pitch before being dismissed for a headbutt on the Nutcases’ goal-keeper, Mooney scored one goal, and had another disallowed by a linesman.  The linesman later admitted that he’d been looking the other way, but he was sure that the ball had not crossed the line.  This brought fresh appeals for the introduction of modern goal-line technology (such as a proper net, rather than a pile of jumpers).

·         For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2012

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