Here is
our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
·
Ivor
Grove, Bromham’s Chief Education Officer, shocked colleagues on both sides of
the Parish Council chamber on Thursday when he announced a plan to re-introduce
bullying and thrashing into Bromham’s schools, in what is widely seen as an
attempted return to the good old days of education. It is understood that more advanced plans to
bring in a system of fagging will be introduced in the next two years.
·
The
comedian Jimmy Tractor took time out from his record-breaking tour of stand-up
gigs in North Wiltshire to make a public statement on his tax affairs, when it
was revealed by most of the regulars in The Wounded Ferret that he was involved
in a complex tax avoidance scheme, which involved offshore parsnips. “I have made a major error of judgement,” he
stated, “in gossiping about my tax affairs down the local. In future I will keep my vegetable avoidance
schemes to myself.”
·
The
only branch of the Bromham Bank stayed open for an extra ten minutes on
Saturday afternoon after a major hardware glitch. Staff found that the padlock and chain
normally used to secure the metal grille on the front door had become tangled
up. Experts were brought in from the
surrounding area before the problem was solved with a pair of bolt-cutters and
a liberal amount of brute force.
·
For
details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local
radio station Carrot FM.
Copyright
Andy Fawthrop 2012
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