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Sunday, 16 April 2017

News From Bromham - Dateline Sunday 16th April 2017

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – Sunday 16th April 2017

Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
                                                  
1.      There was outrage around the world on Tuesday when footage emerged online of a man being forcibly dragged on-board of the 33 Faresaver 10.27 service to Devizes.  The passenger insisted that he actually wanted to go to Chippenham, in the opposite direction, but was told that he had to take the seat to Devizes whether he liked it or not.  A spokes-person for the bus company insisted “we cannot be driving around with empty seats on our buses.  What would the Council say?  The passenger in question was not dragged on-board – he was Denied Involuntarily Standing At A Bus Stop, which is a different thing altogether.”

2.      And, in further shock waves of news, it emerged that the muck-spreading season across Bromham’s vegetable fields had begun.  In the biggest single drop of conventional ordure in peacetime, there was Manure Over All Bromham (MoAB).  Although the event was not formally notified to news agencies globally, there was no need – you could smell it for miles around.

3.      For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2017

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