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Sunday, 25 March 2018

Drivel From Devizes - Dateline Sunday 25th March 2018


Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 25th March 2018

Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:

1.   In a shock move this week, it was revealed that D-Town id-cards (essential for passing unhindered through the town’s military checkpoints) will in future be printed over the border in that there Zummerzet.  It had been thought that once Drexit had been achieved The Vize would be free to shamelessly use its own suppliers within the town, and to cock a snoop at all outsiders, but apparently there are rules against doing this.  A D-Town official spokesman commented “oh, bollocks!”

2.  A warrant was issued in D-Town’s High Court allowing Trading Standards officers to raid the till-rolls in the town’s branch of Sainsbury.  It has been alleged that, in a shocking breach of data privacy laws, the supermarket has been employing some clever people to work out exactly what people are spending their money on, in a brazen attempt to understand stock levels and to re-order certain goods from their suppliers.

3. For details of these and all other Devizes stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station D-Town F-Off.


Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2018


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