Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
· The Manager of Bromham Casuals, Benny Dogleash, has been found innocent of tax evasion after a hearing at a local court. In his defence, Dogleash claimed that he did not understand figures, that he could only write like a two-year-old, and that his wife and accountant ran his life. Faced with this entirely plausible set of reasons, the Prosecution could offer no evidence, and decided to drop the case.
· The recent extended snap of cold weather has played havoc with the local economy. Frosts of down to minus 8C were recorded, and it was assumed that most crops such as carrots and leeks could not be harvested because they were frozen into the ground. However, it transpired that the real reason for non-production was the extended lock-in at The Wounded Ferret following landlady Eileen Dover’s decision to keep the open fires in the lounge bar going on a 24-hour basis.
· Several journalists at The Bromham Bugle were arrested last night in a police “sting” operation. It is thought that they have all been implicated in the listening-at-the-phonebox scandal from 2008-09. The owner of the Bugle, press baron Donald Piglet, is expected to fly into Bromham International Airport this week, in order to speak to staff personally. Piglet’s other title, The News Of Wiltshire (NoW), was forced to close a few months ago following similar revelations.
· For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2012
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