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Sunday, 2 September 2012

News From Bromham - Dateline Sunday 2nd September 2012

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – 2nd September 2012

Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
·         In the Bromham Paralympics, Ted Piglet retained his 200m parsnip-picking Wiltshire record in the SG56T21 class for those with six fingers on each hand, whilst Elaine Piglet narrowly missed out on gold in the wheelchair wurzel-nadgering in the WTF1STHAT class/ section.

·         Popular pub crooner and all-round entertainer Max Piglet died earlier this week after a long struggle with Betty in the back bar of the Wounded Ferret.  Known as “The King Of The Veg Patch” for many years, and his great hit from 1956 “Kohlrabi From Amsterdam”, Max died peacefully in his cups in a ditch beside the A3092.  Commented his daughter, Ida Piglet, “it’s what he would have wanted”.  Other members of his family were unavailable for comment.

·         In a row over carrot-picking standards, the Vegetable Department (VD) Standards Board has refused to re-mark, or to re-classify, any of the participants.  However, disappointed field-workers will be allowed a re-pick in the Autumn.

·         For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2012

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