Black Friday
We had Black Friday when I was a child:
It was a warning issued every year -
A plea to be careful on icy roads,
To protect all that you ever held dear.
But now it’s about something different -
There’s been a big shift in the detail,
An American marketing swizz,
A push to drive up shopping and retail.
A pre-Christmas discounting trick,
Post-Thanksgiving from across the Atlantic,
With bargains and prices knocked down,
Stimulating buying that’s frantic.
They build up the excitement on TV,
Encouraging you to snatch a cheap gift,
As if it’s in your best interest,
Instead of the old stock they want to shift.
Don’t think that they’re doing you a favour,
Don’t believe that one little bit,
You’re just clearing their shelves for them,
So they can sell you even more shit.
Strong elbows are the weapons you need,
To fight your way in for the best,
To get that sixty-inch screen in your bag,
Whilst shoving and pushing over the rest.
You can’t afford to take any prisoners,
If you want a bargain that’s fantastic,
It’s the devil-take-the-hindmost,
When you’re trying to load up your plastic.
The whole nation shows its frustration,
Scenes of fighting that are heart-rending,
There’s grabbing and jabbing and nabbing,
In pursuit of conspicuous spending.
Voices raised high with much shouting,
Like pack animals with their growling,
And the disappointed licking their wounds,
Crying with bitterness and howling.
Their behaviour becomes shameful,
The dominant males are beating their chest,
The women pouting and shouting,
The police move in to make an arrest.
It brings out the worst in human nature,
A vicious competitive streak,
Where only the strong are the winners,
As they rampantly trample the weak.
It’s a long way from the season of goodwill,
Bargain-hunters obsessed and gone manic,
A great bun-fight in the superstores,
With scenes of hysterical panic.
Perhaps we’ve lost sight of the bigger picture,
Of gift selection, or having a fun day.
Now it’s all credit and saving money,
So we can spend it on Cyber Monday.
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