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Sunday, 10 July 2016

News From Bromham - Dateline Sunday 10th July 2016

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – Sunday 10th July 2016
                                             
Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
                                                        
1.       After an amazing, and frankly ludicrous, week in parish politics we now know one clear thing – the next leader of the Field Land-Owners’ Party (FLOP), and therefore Leader of the Parish Council, will be another bumpkin.  After three rounds of pass-the-parcel only two locals were still standing – Tweedle-dee Piglet and Tweedle-dum Piglet.  The names of these two bumpkins will now be put to the wider village electorate.  An attempt to settle the matter by the two candidates fighting each other in a mud-wrestling contest was stopped on the grounds of decency and taste.

2.       After a record-breaking journey of almost 45 minutes, the Bromham deep-Wiltshire road-probe, Tractor 5, was successfully woken from its electronic and mechanical slumber, and is now in steady orbit around the Trowbridge one-way system.  A number of wide orbits will be undertaken in an attempt to discover more about how Trowbridge first came into existence in the dawn of time.  Photographic evidence and elemental samples of traffic film will be sent back to the Command Centre in Bromham, where scientists will scan the materials for any signs of intelligent life.

3.       For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.


Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2016

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