Insomnia
Twisting, tossing, turning,
Side to side, over and over
Restless limbs chasing round the bed
Fighting to find perfect position
Moving, itching, fidgeting
Exhausted and desperate to fall
Into the deep abyss
Where nothingness starts
And the conscious goes amiss
Too cold, then sticking-hot
No ticking-tock of the clock
But hours crawling by, moments only creeping
As if Time might have stopped
Sharp, red digits standing still
How slowly they change, from one to another
But remain implacable, accusing
The mind wanders where it will
Chasing off down rabbit-holes
Following tunnels and corridors
Leading nowhere
Floating, wandering
Falling slowly past cliff-faces rocky and
steep
Never quite reaching
Never getting there
Never hitting bottom
Night-time has a density
An unchanging, unyielding quality
Never ending, giving nothing in return
Silent, dark, impenetrably deep
Eyes and body both yearn and ache
Pursuing elusive snatches of sleep
The brain rattles on chuntering, chattering
An ever-running engine ticking over, never
stalling
Too busy, too many things to do
Names to remember, tasks not to forget
Slowing down finally, it seems
To a new steady rhythm, a gentle quiet
Regular heartbeat, softer breathing
Heading at last toward dreams
Then suddenly racing and speeding again
Around the next corner, solving another puzzle
Remembering names, thinking about tomorrow
Tired, so desperately tired
Another tangle of blankets and sheets
Fighting the covers, thrashing around
Gasping and grasping for rest
Snatching at hope after hope
That somehow the torment will end
Then, quite suddenly, an alarm ringing
New light piercing, a Dawn Chorus of singing
Night, it seems, has stolen away
And bedraggled, be-drowsled
Not calm, not even rested
Head still aching and throbbing
It’s time to start the next day
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