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Sunday, 27 September 2020

Drivel From Devizes - Dateline Sunday 27th September 2020

 Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 27th September 2020

 

Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:

                                              

1.      As the Drexit deadline approaches, and talks with Wiltshire Council appear to be deadlocked, contingency plans are being drawn up by the Town Council to create a new border near Potterne so that customs checks can be carried out there before entering D-Town itself.  In “Operation Stack” cars, lorries, milk-floats and tricycles will be asked to park on pavements in order to avoid blocking the narrow country lanes.  Vehicles will not be allowed in to other parts of Wiltshire unless they can prove that they have the correct paperwork for D-Town entry.

 

2.      Students at D-Town’s 1-star “university” have been asked to self-isolate for 14 days after some of them tested positive for aggravated stupidity.  Student residency blocks have been cordoned off and emergency supplies are being shipped in, including food, water, alcohol, weed, chemical substances, games consoles, wifi passwords and turnips.  Applications from various poorer town residents to go and join them have been refused, on the grounds that we can’t all be expected to have fun.

 

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2020

 

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