Paranoid @ Christmas
Finished with my turkey
'cause I couldn’t stuff it any more
People think I'm insane
Because I find Christmas such a chore
All day long I think of sprouts
But they don’t seem to satisfy
Think I'll lose my appetite
If I don't find something to get me by
Can you help me? Rich giblet gravy? Oh yeah!
I need someone to show me
The gifts in shops that I can't find
I can't see the baubles that make true happiness,
I must be blind
Pull a cracker and I will sigh
And you will laugh and I will cry
Paper hats I do not like
And jokes to me are so unreal
And so as you hear these words
Telling you now of my state
I tell you to enjoy Christmas –
I wish I could but it's too late!
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