Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline –
Sunday 14th April 2013
Here is
our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
·
1. Tensions
continue to mount in Bromham as North Seend continues to make threatening
diplomatic and military moves on its borders with South Seend. Citizens have been warned to leave the area
as North Seend continues to insist that it cannot guarantee their safety in the
event of an escalation in hostilities.
The situation has been exacerbated by Trowbridge sending one its County
Councillors into the area for talks with both sides. Holiday bookings for the Bromham Nuclear
Bunker have been suspended for the duration.
· 2. Traffic
in the High Street will come to a halt on Wednesday at noon, in tribute to the
memory of Margaret “Snatcher” Piglet, who died last week. The funeral is being held with no military
honours whatsoever, and at no public expense, at the nearby crematorium (no
flowers please, friends and family only).
Piglet was a former hard-right leader of the Field Land-Owners’ Party
(FLOP), known as The Iron Battleaxe, and her political legacy has sharply
divided opinion in the snug bar of The Wounded Ferret, where the landlord is
offering free pints of his special celebration brew, “Rust In Peace”.
· 3. For
details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local
radio station Carrot FM.
Copyright
Andy Fawthrop 2013
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