The Apathy Alliance
It seems that someone fired the starting gun
To trigger the Election race,
For voting in the next Parliament.
Well - the politicians think that’s the case.
Tories and Labour will start slugging it out,
With their slogans and their sound-bites,
And all the smaller parties shouting out too,
And the debates descending to fights.
With rows about the economy.
The deficit and the NHS,
I’m very tempted to try and sleep through it,
Cos I’m bored to death by it, I confess.
There’s Cameron and Osborne and Clegg,
The Greens and UKIP with their strident voices,
The SNP and what’s left of the Lib-Dems:
What a bloody awful set of choices!
That guy Farage sounds like a nut-case.
I’m tempted to stick my head in the sand.
It’s all just too awful to contemplate,
And that’s without mentioning Miliband!
But it’s hard to avoid the whole damn thing,
And my response ought to be more hearty,
So I’m speaking for the Great British public,
By forming the Apathy Party.
We’ll not have any policies,
Nor any candidates to be selected,
We’re not going to speak out for anything,
To ensure that we don’t get elected.
No representation in Westminster,
Cos we don’t trust any MPs,
Fiddling allowances and expenses:
No – we don’t to be part of that wheeze.
Our platform will be the living room couch,
And we’ll ignore the debates on TV,
Our key-note will be indifference -
We’re not bothered, we’re full of ennui.
We’re not interested in Government,
Nor voting at a polling station,
We have no kind of manifesto,
And we don’t care about immigration.
We set any Alliance at defiance,
We don’t want a power-sharing pact.
As voters we’re just floaters,
But we’re a demographic fact.
And European membership -
Should we be in, or should we be out?
We don’t give a toss either way -
Of that there should be no doubt.
So I’m going to stick my head in the sand
Just hoping it’ll all go away
That the time will pass relatively quickly
Before the final reckoning in May.
I don’t care for the Hustings or ballot
Millions of us in this majority
The polls every morn, produce only a yawn,
You can have that on good authority.
I can’t stand this for much longer
I’m just hoping it’ll end pretty soon
So I’m off to get my head down now
You can wake me up again in June.
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