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Sunday, 22 May 2016

News From Bromham - Dateline Sunday 22nd May 2016

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – Sunday 22nd May 2016
                                             
Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:

1.       In a surprise statement, Bromham Universal Studios have announced that their Beechwood Studios are to be used for filming a new series of “Carry On” films.  The first few titles are likely to be “Carry On Parsnip-Picking”, “Carry On Up The Carrot” and “Carry On In The Family”, all being references to those things for which Bromham is (in)famous.  As most of the original “Carry On” cast are now deceased, the roles will be undertaken by local Bromham personalities, including Beet O’Toole,  Kale Richards and Sean Bean.

2.       Bromham Golf Club (The “Rough and Ugly”) will not be able to stage any future Open (or Closed) tournaments after members voted not to allow the entrance of oiks as members. Whilst oiks may play a round, or even enter the Clubhouse, they may only do so as the guests of full nob members.  A local oik spoke of his disappointment that, in the 21st Century, the club had failed to update its outmoded prejudices by not allowing oiks to become complete nobs.

3.       For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.


Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2016

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