Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 18th April 2021
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. The Duck of the Crammer was ceremonially laid to rest yesterday. A minute’s silence was held at 3pm, scrupulously observed by the local citizenry. The Duck was borne to the Palace of Roses Butchers (Purveyors of meat & game to the gentry), where the duck-bearers paused for a moment whilst a car-exhaust in Sidmouth Street gave a single backfire, prior to entering the premises. D-Town FC kicked off early to avoid clashing with the ceremony, but still lost by the traditional score of 6-1.
2. Meanwhile the Town Council has launched a judge-led enquiry into the apparent scandal caused by the unofficial approaches of a former mayor, David Gissabung, to the current Treasurer of the Council on behalf of the private company Greensmell. The scope of the enquiry will be added to other enquiries involving bears going into forested areas for toilet purposes, popes being accused of being a bit High Church, and whether Dolly Parton has to sleep on her back.
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2021
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