Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 19th June 2022
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. Political lines were sharply drawn in The Vize this week as last-minute legal protests successfully stopped the first deportation flight from D-Town International Airport from taking off on its journey to the outer wilds of East Grinstead. The scheme, to deport anyone suspected of being a newcomer (defined as “anyone not having lived in D-Town for at least six generations”) for “processing” in one of the world’s most inhospitable places, has been controversial. Some argue that the threshold should be lowered as far as four generations. Others think that anyone born with the abnormal number of ten toes should go. In contrast, Shearings, the coach firm that specialises in little trips out for the geriatric and feeble-minded, is debating whether to begin running day-trips to East Grinstead’s pleasure gardens and main punishment centre.
2. But all of this was as but nothing compared to the sheer colour and spectacle of the Royal D-Town Racing Festival, held this year in Farmer Brown’s bottom field. All manner of D-Town dignitaries were seen to attend, including the Mayor and most of the Council, although that funny bloke at the end of the Council-chamber was persuaded at the last minute to stay away. A wide range of hats and fascinators, together with animal-print dresses, tight skirts and very high heels, was on display. But not to be out-done by the men, the ladies also got a bit dressed up. The event was deemed to be a huge success, and the experiment of actually piping in prosecco and champagne from a slurry-tanker parked on the edge of the course, rather than the non-eco-friendly single-use bottles, was judged to be an initiative worth persisting with.
Copyright Andy
Fawthrop 2022
No comments:
Post a Comment