What Made Britain Great
How great is our civilisation?
And the evolution of mankind?
How advanced is our technology?
A superior species I think that you’ll find.
How far spread the great British Empire?
When the world map was covered with pink?
Where the Sun never set upon our Dominions,
We were at our greatest I think.
But, to what could we ascribe this grandeur?
What driving force took us so far?
Was it the invention of fire? Or the wheel?
Of steam power? Or
of the motor car?
Yes they were important, I’ll agree,
Their places in history are taken,
But surely more vital to any progress
Was the idea of a sandwich – with bacon!
Who first thought to cure the meat of the pig?
In a mixture of spices and brine to soak it?
To give it the gift of preservation,
And then to go on, and to smoke it?
What’s better than the smell of pork cooking?
An aroma that forces the senses to waken -
A sure cure for vegetarianism,
Is the grilling or frying of bacon!
Two slices of white buttered bread,
And great dollops of brown sauce,
Rashers of streaky, with the fat running,
Is a feast for a king, the very best course.
Yes, they invented a prime delicacy –
About that you must not be mistaken.
Crisp slivers of meat with a rind on,
The heavenly substance known as bacon.
So get yourself a flitch or a roll,
Don’t leave yourself God-forsaken,
It’s not something for faking,
Forget all about baking,
You know that you’re aching,
A bap or a butty to be making,
The thing to eat upon waking,
The very best meal to be taking
Yes, the force of the Universe….is bacon!
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