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Sunday, 23 December 2012

News From Bromham - Dateline Sunday 23rd December 2012

Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline – 23rd December 2012

Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
·       Life in Bromham carried on as usual, after it turned out that the ancient Trowbridge Prediction, that the world would end in Wiltshire on Friday last, turned out to be false.  Ancient documents bearing hieroglyphic script, which had been found in the county town several years ago, and had been interpreted as being the calendar of a long-extinct people, turned out to be merely some old Council Minutes which had been left out in the rain by accident.

·       A row has broken out between PC Plodge, who occasionally patrols the village streets, and the secretary of the Bromham Parish Council, who tried to leave his bicycle outside the Social Centre last week.  The Clerk denies swearing at the PC, or calling him a “total twat” or indicating that he should “know his place”.  The PC claims that the Clerk was abusive, and that he was about to commit an offence by chaining his bicycle to a non-approved fence-post.  A large crowd, who happened to be passing by at the time, cheered both sides in turn as the “conversation” developed.

·       And a MERRY CHRISTMAS to all our faithful leaders.  Try and enjoy it, even if means a diet of over-cooked turkey, tired old “specials” on the TV, transport breakdowns & hold-ups, and a seemingly random approach to opening times and transport timetables for about two weeks.  And if you see a bloke dressed in red up on your roof – it’s not Santa Claus.  It’ll be a burglar.  Yo-ho-ho.

·       For details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local radio station Carrot FM.

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2012

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