It was a very quiet twelve
months
Nothing very much to speak
of in twenty-twelveI can’t think of too much of note
As into the memory-banks
I’m tempted to delve.
Alright there were a few
celebrations
And one or two sporting
events
The Olympics, the
Paralympics
There was Ennis and Mo
And Sebastian Coe
A G4S fiasco
A Tour de France won by
Wiggo
And twenty-nine gold
medals or so.
I suppose there was Old
Lil’s Diamond Jubilee
With concerts &
pageants and a Thames flotilla
The dignitaries wore a
topper
The Queen jumped out of a
chopper
Without coming a cropper
No, nothing could stop ‘er
Then Phil was too ill to
govern
And Kate got a bun in the
oven
And there was the bloody
awful weather
At least we were all in
that together
There were droughts and
hose-pipe bans
Then downpours and deluges
People forced into refuges
Fields that were flooded
Homes that were muddied
And insurance that
wouldn’t pay out
Goodbye to Comet, and
farewell to others
Some that we counted as
brothers
Armstrong took one small
step into the beyond
And Andersen’s Thunderbirds flying no more
So long to Hagman, to Houston, and old Moore
To Sassoon and Summer and
Sykes and Shankar
To Andy Williams and Bert
Weedon
To Etta James and Davy
Jones
Robin Gibb and Max
Bygraves
Clive Dunn and Frank
Carson
Now all sadly gone to
their graves
Yes OK, Entwistle and the
BBC
Savile, and Leveson and
all that bollocks
News Of The World, Rebekah
Brooks & the Murdochs
Politicians left to their
fate
Dorries in a jungle
The scandal of “plebgate”
All a bit of a bungle
Cameron lost his daughter
in a pub
And Clegg lost his nerve
when it came to the nub
Fights, riots, Pussy Riot
Corporate tax-avoiders
Barclays, and LIBOR, and
Bob Diamond
Fiddling the rates at
their leisure
Bankers’ bonuses, Boyle
and Boris
And Balding became a
national treasure.
No women bishops in the C
of E
(Which seems very strange
I confess
When the new Archbishop’s
Allowed to walk round in a
dress)
Assange holed up in an
embassy
Rowling’s writing for
adults
A Casual Vacancy, what can
I say
The Dandy’s gone
all-electronic
And everyone pretended
They hadn’t read Fifty
Shades Of Grey
Apparently the World
didn’t come to an end
And we all lived to fight
another day.
There was a US Fiscal
Cliff approaching
So The President gambled
With the Republicans in
the Senate
But it all Omnishambled
To a conclusion in the
end.
Facebook fell on its face
Starbucks was bucked by
its customers
And promised to pay
dribbles of tax
And wars carried on in
Syria and Palestine
And Afghanistan – and
those are the facts!
And under a car-park in
Leicester
They found Richard the
Third
But apart from all that……
Absolutely nothing
occurred!
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2013
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