Drivel From Devizes - Dateline Sunday 16th August 2020

 Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 16^th August 2020

 

Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:

                                       

1.      Schoolchildren in D-Town are on the march against the education authorities after many of them had their expected “E” grades downgraded to an “F” or a “who is this person please?”  Many parents, unaware that their darling offspring had even been due to take any exams, expressed their surprise at all the fuss, since they weren’t expecting their sprogs to do anything with their lives anyway.  The Local Health Authority, however, has taken up this new approach with gusto, allowing them to increase the amount of virus testing exponentially – so now you don’t even need to have a Covid-19 test: they simply predict whether you would have been positive or not.

 2.      Meanwhile there was an unseemly scramble to get back into the borough before 4am on Saturday morning when new quarantine rules came into force.  The last 49 buses from Swindon and Trowvegas were packed with people trying to escape the pubs in those resorts, and to get back to D-Town before last orders were called in MartinSpoons.

 

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2020