Panic-O-Virus
There’s been an epidemic coming
It’s been on its way for simply ages
It’s been building up its power
And now it’s in its final stages
The symptoms are easy to describe
And include a sudden worry onset
Followed by a raise in temperature
And nervous twitching -that’s what you’ll get
Panic is a bug extremely infectious
(And also contagious we’re being told)
It’s worse than mere anger or jealousy
Once it’s got you, and taken its hold
It’s spreading by daily contact
From those who’ve travelled far around
Yet the virus itself is quite invisible
And its compass knows of no bound
If you catch it you’ll soon feel hot under the collar
You’ll want to go out and do your panic shop
And, like the others who’ve caught it,
Purchase so many toilet rolls that you’ll drop
You’ll be overcome by greed and by envy
Empathy to you will become a lost cause
As you seethe, and tuck into your dinner –
Lovely dried pasta in an antibacterial sauce
You need to get out there – go forth and panic
And infect with panic everyone you see
Then they can pass on the panic virus
Until the panic has spread through society
We need to get this to epidemic proportions
Until the Earth upon its wobbly axis tips
Otherwise it’s wasting the best chance we’ve got
Of creating a true zombie apocalypse
To engender a new land of confusion
Where worry and panic become endemic
Rising to record levels of total hysteria
And fomenting a total panic pandemic
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