Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline
– Sunday 29th September 2013
Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
1.
In a comprehensive report, issued this week by
Bromham Chamber of Commerce, it was reported that the temperature in the Back
Room of The Wounded Ferret is predicted to rise by several degrees over the
next few months. Data which has been
gathered, analysed and peer-reviewed by the bloke in the corner cottage, seems
to confirm that this is due to a combination of switching on the Central
Heating, and the lighting of a welcoming fire in the 19th-century
fireplace, providing irrefutable proof that temperature change is in fact
man-made.
2.
Ted
Willybanned, leader of the Carrot-Rooters’ Action Party (CRAP), made an
impassioned speech this week at his party’s annual conference in the Social
Centre (Small Meeting Room), calling for the retail price of carrots to be
fixed for at least 20 months. Although
this was received by Mrs Piglet in the High Street as a popular move, it was
immediately condemned by Dave Wentwrong, leader of the Field Land-Owners’ Party
(FLOP) as unrealistic and a piece of “parsnip politics”.
3.
For
details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local
radio station Carrot FM.
Copyright
Andy Fawthrop 2013
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