Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 28th July 2024
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. Unable to afford the cost of sending a full team to the Paris Olympics, the local Clowncil have done the second-best thing, by creating a more “local” set of Olympics, to be held in the big field at the side of the canal (inside Church Hall if wet). Eschewing the more traditional competitive sports, there will events in goat nadgering, sticking pencils up your nose (ladies only), carrying a round of 18 mixed drinks back to your table in a crowded pub, floodlit horse massage, professional all-comers shoplifting (three categories) and loitering with intent near a zebra crossing.
2. The effect of having a new Labour government in Whitehall is already showing huge benefits. Since Sir Near Starkers came to power the weather has been better, England reached the final of the European Championship, and my girlfriend has started wearing less bling and makeup in favour of her new summer wardrobe. This would never have happened under the Tories.
Copyright Andy
Fawthrop 2024
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