Bulletin From Bromham: Dateline
– Sunday 10th April 2016
Here is our weekly round-up of events from Bromham:
1. The
leader of the Parish Council, Dave Campervan, has finally admitted telling the
odd porky-pie about his financial affairs.
At the fifth time of asking, and in response to several straight
questions, he has conceded that he did once pay income tax in the past five
years. He said that he had been taught
to avoid tax by his father, whom he very much respected, that he had never paid
income tax, and that on the one occasion when he had “foolishly” actually paid
some tax, he had felt bad about it. He
has now promised to “learn lessons” about paying tax, not to “blame others”
about paying tax and, in future, to “handle things rather better” about not
paying tax. The opposition leader Jezzer
“Cor” Binn was apoplectic with rage, and thus unable to speak.
2. Journalists
at the Bromham Bugle have spent the past few days, outside of opening hours at
the pub, combing through documents leaked from the international law firm
Swindel, Leggitt and Lye (the Trowbridge Papers) trying to piece together what
any of them actually mean. They have
threatened to expose as wrong-doers anyone that they find even mentioned in the
papers, whether they have actually done anything illegal or not. Their task is not being made by any easier by
the fact that the correspondence is all written in Portuguese, which none of
the hacks involved actually speaks.
Still, it keeps them busy.
3.
For
details of these and all other Bromham stories, don’t forget to listen to local
radio station Carrot FM.
Copyright
Andy Fawthrop 2016
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