Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 30th December
2018
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1.
D-Town
Council declared a “major incident” this week when it was noticed that an
increasing number of economic refugees from Trowvegas were failing to stay on
board the 49 bus as it passed through the town and carry on to the desolate
wilds of Swindon. In contravention of
international treaties, several of these people were seen to be attempting to
stay in the town and to claim political asylum.
2.
And
police have begun rounding up confused residents and visitors in the town after
many of them were found wandering in a confused state. Several claimed not to know what day of the
week it was. One man said he had no idea
what day his next black bin collection would be. And no-one had a clue what buses were running
and to what, if any, timetable. The
confusion was blamed on the fact that Christmas Day and New Year’s Day had
occurred again this year. Despite many
warnings on public media and by the marketing departments of several leading
supermarkets, these public holidays had come yet again as a complete surprise
to many people. No muppets were harmed
in the making of this report.
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2018
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