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Sunday 30 May 2021

Drivel From Devizes - Dateline Sunday 30th May 2021

Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 30th 2021 

Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:                                              

1.      An international incident was sparked this week when a Swindon to Trowvegas bus, routed through D-Town, was hijacked on the outskirts of The Sham and forced to terminate its journey on the Bowerhill Industrial Estate.  Once there, a passenger was removed, along with his girlfriend, and detained at a local branch of Screwfix, where he was made to purchase several plumbing items that he did not really need.  A tattered parts catalogue was later discovered on the back seat of the bus, which was later allowed to continue its original journey.  The incident had been condemned as borough-sponsored terrorism. 

2.      And yesterday, in a secret and surprise ceremony held at The Vize’s  St. Chlamydia Basilica on the High Street, the leader of the Council, Justin Case, was formally married to his current fiancée, Jenny Tailyer.  Nearly five people attended.  The Service was held according the rites of the Happy Clappy Church, whose members believe in conscious incompetence, serial mendacity, and periodic self-immolation.  Mr. R. U. Joking was the best man. 

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2021

 

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