Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 12th September 2021
Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:
1. An inquiry is to be held by local newsagents in the town as to whether a copy of The Daily Torygraph was correctly delivered to the Big House on Long Street, residence of local celebrity Andy Aznaclue. Lawyers for the newsagents claim that the rag was fully posted through the letter-box, but Aznaclue’s lawyers claim otherwise, and that a section was left sticking out. A delivery driver from the local Pizza Express, however, had no difficulty whatsoever in serving the gentleman in question.
2. Meanwhile, a young British teenager, has just become the first female competitor to win a Grand Slam tournament in over 40 years by taking the US Open championship. Emma Canardlypronunouncu, who has absolutely no direct connection with D-Town, but whose auntie is once rumoured to have visited the town (although it might have been Totnes in Devon – she can’t quite remember), is said to be “thrilled” that everyone she’s never met here was cheering her on the final match on TV.
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2021
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