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Sunday 2 June 2019

Drivel From Devizes - Dateline Sunday 2nd June 2019


Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 2nd June 2019

Here is our weekly round-up of events from D-Town:

1.      The race to become the next leader of D-Town has heated up over the last week, with 96 potential candidates now having thrown their hat into the ring.  Council workmen are now battling to clear away all the hats before they become a public health hazard.  The latest contenders are the caretaker at the Town Hall (whose slogan is “I can’t do any worse than the rest of this shower”) and the janitor’s cat (whose slogan is “meow”).

2.      And opinion is divided in The Vize between those who want to welcome the civic visit of Mr Fat Rump (from the Wiltshire Evil Empire), and those who wish to protest against it.  Permission has been given for protests to go ahead, including the flying of a large blimp in the shape of a Coke and hamburger, and will be guarded by up to three police officers.  Pubs in the town will have extended opening hours to cater for the crowds, including both protesters and those who, frankly, don’t give a monkeys.  Any excuse really.

Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2019

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