Oblivion
It is the fear that drives me
That informs my thoughts
The fear of the possible pain to come
The misery and the suffering
The indignity and the shame
At final journey’s end
Not knowing how deep that well may be
That I must tumble into
The fear of missing-out
Of no longer being involved
The not knowing what happens
To my people, those I love
In the soap opera of their lives
The thought that others will continue
To live their lives, when I do not
That the play will go on to the next act
Long after I make my final exit
Everything gone
Everything lost
Better far for it all to be over
Quick and sudden, un-signalled
A total not-knowing-ness
Before and when it happens
Like falling into deep and dreamless sleep
From which one never wakes
That one does not know
Or the instant loss of consciousness
From the kindly anaesthetic
Then a different state of not-being
No knowledge, no knowing
No memory whatever
An empty obsidian darkness
A thoughtless depth of blackness
An indescribable emptiness
A black hole of nothingness
Profound and endless
That absorbs everything
That has no dimension
In time or space
But just is
No time for regret
Or shame or worry
No anxiety
Just gone
Done
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2021
No comments:
Post a Comment