Drivel From Devizes: Dateline – Sunday 25th October 2020
Here is our weekly
round-up of events from D-Town:
1. Citizens awoke in D-Town this morning to the shock news that British Summer Time is over and the clocks have gone back an hour. Taken totally by surprise, people have wondered how this has ever been allowed to happen, and why (oh, why?) there had been so little warning of such an amazing event. It had all been so unexpected. A campaign has been launched to have large posters erected in The Vize to warn people of the coming apocalypse of Halloween, Christmas and New Year. Advance notice on Pancake Day next year will also be given.
2. And
several charity organisations around the borough have clubbed together to
ensure that no school-child goes hungry during the half-term school holidays. Volunteers, led by local footballer Drew
Peacock, have spent the week putting together lunchboxes and distributing them
to the local hordes of feral yoof. The boxes
contain a nutritious mix of items designed to mimic as closely as possible the
normal school-time luncheon fare – two slices of Dairylea processed cheese, three
turkey twizzlers, a packet of salt n’ vinegar crisps, a can of Red Bull and a
flick-knife.
Copyright Andy Fawthrop 2020
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